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Trolling the Troll

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Pout harder [Photo credit: Kevin Lamarque/REUTERS]

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Americans have known for a while that my uncle has the thinnest skin on the planet. We now know that Vice President Kamala Harris is all the way under it because Donald keeps admitting it.

“I’m very angry at her,” Donald said Thursday. “I think I’m entitled to personal attacks. I don’t have a lot of respect for her. I don’t have a lot of respect for her intelligence, and I think she’ll be a terrible president.” 

Donald can’t handle losing, but losing to a Black woman is particularly hard for him to bear. Harris’s campaign team deserves a lot of credit for understanding just how to put pressure on Donald’s very fragile psyche. Their rapid-response and press teams are running an edgy presidential campaign that is unique, as far as I know, in modern American political history. It’s the kind of approach that both highlights and exacerbates Donald’s weaknesses. It also makes it impossible for Donald to stay on message and stay away from the kind of personal attacks that his advisors are desperate for him to drop because they’re endangering his reelection bid.

Donald’s narcissistic injury is so great that he has essentially stopped campaigning in swing states. Multiple reports say that he can’t control his impulses in private. He continues to be furious that he’s no longer running against President Biden. More than anything, he perseverates about crowd sizes—both publicly and privately.

Sensing its advantage, just a few hours before Donald’s pathetic attempt to reclaim the spotlight by holding another staged event, the Harris campaign put out a media advisory, but not just any media advisory:

“TODAY: Donald Trump To Ramble Incoherently and Spread Dangerous Lies in Public, but at Different Home. TODAY at 4:30 p.m. — Donald J. Trump, loser of the 2020 election by 7 million votes, will hold another public meltdown in Bedminster, New Jersey.”

That’s quality trolling. It’s was also pretty prescient. 

For so many years, Democrats have taken the high road (remember “When they go low, we go high?”). Unfortunately, Donald and the Republican Party have gone lower than most people thought possible.

So, we’re not “going high” any more. What the Harris and Walz ticket understands is that the best way to take down a bully with the kind of power Donald Trump has, the kind of unimaginable power he hopes to seize, is to mock him and encourage others to laugh at him.

“She actually called me weird,” Donald whined Thursday. “‘He’s weird.’ And it was just a soundbite. And she called JD and I weird. He’s not weird.” Methinks thou dost protest too much. Also, cry harder.

It’s a disjointed and rattled response from a clearly unwell man. Harris and Walz, on the other hand, are running a joyful, cohesive campaign. And while the joy they have brought to this race has been widely discussed, the effect that joy has on Donald hasn’t. It’s his kryptonite because he doesn’t understand it, he doesn’t know how to generate for himself or for his campaign, and it causes him pain. He has no idea how to combat the fact that he’s losing, so he engages in more cruelty. And so the cycle continues, and he continues to get worse.

The Harris campaign is happy to help. I want to note, however, that it’s not only getting under Donald’s skin that’s going to propel Harris to win this race; it’s the contrast between the campaigns.

Examples one, on Friday, while speaking at her economic policy rollout in North Carolina, Harris remarked that she used to work at McDonald’s. Donald had a million dollars by the time he was a year old.

Example two, the Harris campaign recently sent out a fundraising email in which the Vice President talked about how she felt on Election Night 2016.

It was incredibly bittersweet. When I took the stage for my acceptance speech—to represent California in the Senate—I tore up my notes. I just said, ‘We will fight.’ Then I went home and I sat on the couch with a family-sized bag of nacho Doritos. I did not share one chip with anybody. Not even Doug. I just watched the TV with utter shock and dismay.

That may be one of the most relatable things a candidate has ever said. I challenge anybody to come up with a comparable moment of honesty and vulnerability from Donald Trump.

Kamala Harris isn’t afraid of Donald, and her campaign reflects that. But Kamala Harris also isn’t afraid to be herself, and her campaign reflects that, too.

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Spoyl
20 days ago
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newtgeiszler: savvy-ivvory: gael-garcia: It’s the Basic...

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newtgeiszler:

savvy-ivvory:

gael-garcia:

It’s the Basic Ball!

A ball for the rest of the LGBT-cuties.

—A Black Lady Sketch Show 1x02

That “Bitch he’s not eating he’s at work” has me flatlined

this sketch cured my depression i don’t have to go to therapy anymore i’m uplifted and seen and felt and heard and held

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Spoyl
20 days ago
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American Versus European Out-of-Office Replies

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American: I am out of the office between 10 p.m. and 4 a.m., I am so, so sorry.

European: I am out of the office from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. (for tapas).

- - -

American: I am in the bathroom, and will respond to your email from the toilet.

European: I am taking my government-mandated eight-week summer vacation and will reply when the autumnal Mediterranean breeze kisses my cheeks.

- - -

American: I am out of the office for the next thirty minutes at a biopsy, but because I live in constant fear of unemployment I have pre-scheduled thirty-seven emails and Slack messages so that my boss thinks I am at my desk.

European: Désolé! Taking a mental-health year.

- - -

American: I will be slow to respond to your email, as I was suspended without pay for opening an unsolicited email promotion for CBD oil.

European: Sorry for the slow response. Our office observes MDMA Thursdays and the beat just dropped.

- - -

American: I am out of the office until tomorrow. For urgent matters, contact Office Director Jamie Franklin (jfranklin@hyperion.com), call me on my cell (310-555-1711), or come to my house and break down the door. Don’t mind the newborn, he startles easy.

European: It is after 4:30 p.m., and your email has been automatically forwarded to Interpol as a reported human rights violation.

- - -

American: I was T-boned by a Ford F-450 and am in an ambulance performing an emergency hand amputation on myself. I will reply to your email as soon as I learn to type with my bloody elbows.

European: I got a runny nose from biking to work through an exotic flower garden and will be on paid medical leave until the next World Cup.

- - -

American: I am in second place rounding the final corner in the Olympic four-hundred-meter hurdles—ping me on Slack and I will sort you out in between strides. #multitasking #mindbody #grindset

European: I am at Oktoberfest with my boss for a “team-building activity.” Prost!

- - -

American: I may be slow to reply to emails because I googled the word “union” on company Wi-Fi, and I have now been placed in The Box.

European: I am out of the office indefinitely, because I have reached the mandatory retirement age of forty-two.

- - -

American: I have been fired by HyperConquest Services. Therefore, I will only be working for them twenty-five hours per week.

European: As of 2019, I no longer work at NordiHaven Solutions. If you are receiving this reply, it means I am still getting my paycheck.

- - -

American: I have snuck away from work to vote in an election that will determine, among other things, whether the attorney general can summarily execute unemployed kittens.

European: I am out of the office this week to riot over public university tuition rising to thirty euros per year.

- - -

American: I am out of the office this afternoon giving birth to triplets. I will respond, but please forgive any typoOAAARRRGHHH.

European: I am on government bereavement leave while my goldfish receives publicly funded hospice care.

- - -

American: Due to unregulated workplace safety standards, I have been shredded to death by a runaway industrial photocopier. I am finally free, ascending toward a magnificent light, my entire body dissolving into mist as I am enveloped in a glowing, warm consciousness. I have floated into the Great Beyond and am communing with my ancestors, stretching back countless millennia. I will respond before COB.

European: Good news! I am in the office and will be replying after my lunch hour (10 a.m.–4:30 p.m.)

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Spoyl
24 days ago
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1 public comment
fxer
24 days ago
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> Our office observes MDMA Thursdays and the beat just dropped
Bend, Oregon

20240720

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Spoyl
48 days ago
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Hatchery

1 Comment and 3 Shares
Anadromous fish are more vulnerable in rivers, since the lack of salt means you can quickly crack passwords using rainbow trout tables.
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Spoyl
56 days ago
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satadru
50 days ago
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This was great.
New York, NY

The Elephant in the Room

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The room is
almost all
elephant.
Almost none
of it isn’t.
Pretty much
solid elephant.
So there’s no
room to talk
about it.
Kay Ryan

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Spoyl
69 days ago
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